Aaron Hernandez Truly Is An Idiot

 

I mean, duh. This much is clear. Still, every shred of new evidence that surfaces continues to confirm how unbelievably carefree and sloppy he was about MURDERING someone. Not even just someone–his damn friend. Like, he knew that if people found out about this, he would be going to prison, right? BECAUSE IT KINDA SEEMS LIKE HE DIDN’T KNOW THAT.

Sure, there’s the ego that comes with being a spoiled, unduly worshiped professional football player. And I’m sure he has some sort of invincibility complex like most privileged males. But seriously, seriously, how did he think this was going to unfold? I feel like he thought it would be one big ‘ol NBD if peeps found out about it because it’s looking like he did very little to prevent all of this from unraveling.

GUYS: “New surveillance photos released Thursday appear to show former New England Patriot Aaron Hernandez in his living room carrying what is believed to be a handgun in the hours before the former NFL star allegedly committed murder,” NBC News reported.

Aaron Hernandez is an idiot

(via)

DID HE NOT KNOW HE HAD CAMERAS IN HIS HOUSE? WHAT THE WHAT THE WHAT? Didn’t anyone ever show him how those cameras work? Like how they’re positioned throughout his home and that they record shit when they’re on?

“The documents also say that shell casings found in a car that investigators believe Hernandez rented match those found near the body of the man Hernandez is charged with murdering.”

So, Aaron Hernandez and his boys definitely probably shoot Odin Lloyd and afterwards, nobody thinks to, I dunno, CLEAN UP THE EVIDENCE EXPLICITLY LINKING THEM TO THE MURDER OF THEIR FRIEND? They couldn’t even make the effort to at least throw the bullet casings out of the damn car that Odin was last seen in?

LAKSDFJALKDFJALK JDSKLAJFAOIDFASJK JASFL ;AKSDJFSADFKJ

A literal child could have pulled off a murder better than this. Ya know, it might sound morbid, but honestly, if I had to be murdered, I kinda hope someone would put a bit more thought and planning into it than this.

OH YEAH AND THERE’S MORE. When Hernandez was asked about Earnest Wallace, his friend and a suspect in the murder, “Hernandez told investigators that he did not have a phone number for Wallace, yet Wallace’s number was later found in Hernandez’s cell phone contacts.”

Dude. Really?

This whole thing went down in Boston of all places. If there’s one thing my four years in that city taught me, it’s that the Boston Police Department (and really any police department bordering Boston) is one group of people I am not trying to fuck around with. Didn’t Aaron Hernandez see The Departed? He never caught a late night episode of I (Almost) Got Away With It?

Also, this fool keeps rolling up in court looking as relaxed as an old southern lady sitting on her porch sipping sweet tea on a warm summer afternoon.

Aaron Hernandez is an idiot(Ted Fitzgerald/Boston Herald via AP Photo)

YOU’RE BEING ACCUSED OF MURDER, HOMIE. LOOK ALIVE.

As of Monday, July 31st, authorities in Hernandez’s hometown of Bristol, CT began searching a pond, presumably for the gun that killed Odin Lloyd which has yet to be recovered. I’m also going to assume that this search was spurred by some sort of tip or in light of some information, meaning that there’s a pretty good chance they’re going to find a Glock in the bottom of that pond.

Guys, I think I figured it out. Maybe Aaron Hernandez decided to graciously orchestrate some kind of  team building crime scavenger hunt for the local police because I KNOW this man would not seriously dispose of a murder weapon by plopping it in a small body of sedentary water in his hometown. PLEASE let them find the gun in the bottom of that pond. It would really round out this master class in How to Commit a Murder In the Absolute Dumbest Way Possible.

Originally posted by Kara Brown at Yo I’m Just Sayin. Republished with permission.

97 COMMENTS

  1. Ha.. Great article. I couldn’t agree more. I mean, where is the thought… Vince Young is smarter than this, and we have all seen his Wonderlic scores! I’m in a constant state of disbelief with people that are this stupid, especially those in the public eye.. Again.. Well written!

  2. I have to agree with Chris. Very well written article. you should apply with all the major news papers. If things were wrote as honest as this maybe the media wouldn’t be getting in the way of justice. Blows my mind that Hernandez would throw away his life and career like this you have to admit the beast had talent. And beast he is, anyone that could take a life/ lives so cold like that can not be considered man or human.

  3. I love how you can tell a female wrote this by making sexist comments like… And I’m sure he has some sort of invincibility complex like most privileged males… And they say men are the sexist ones. Bitch act like females don’t act the same way when they are privileged.

    • lol at you taking one line of it and getting your panties in a bunch. I love how we can tell you are a douche bag.

      • I was actually doing that in order to keep the comment short so retarded people like yourself would comment back without losing focus with your short attention span. You can also tell it was a female by the wording in the whole article. Thanks for trying though.

          • You obviously don’t even know what backtrack means, because there wasn’t even the slightest bit of backtracking in my last comment. Don’t use words you don’t understand little guy.

          • ahahah you are so tough. A man’s man, right? Mr macho camacho totally dude rock on. You can talk tough online bro, but you still have a tiny dick. You will always have a tiny dick. Be mad. Stay mad!

          • @ johnathankannalives u are talking just as much shit as he is online, so does that mean u have just as tiny of a dick as he does.

          • Mad? Why would I be mad? Because you don’t even know me? I wouldn’t be mad about that. We can all make assumptions. But what I said in my original comment was facts. Then you had to come out talking shit. It’s all good though bro, I’m not worried about you.

          • so you can talk shit but then when others talk it back to you, you want to whine like a child. seems the talk about privilege pissed you off because its right.it struck a nerve in you as a white male who is used to doing whatever he wants.you got called on your bs and can’t take it

  4. I’m not sure how… but you left out my favorite “screw up” of his; the fact that he also took a mirror FB-esque selfie with the gun. It’s nothing short of epic stupidity, and it’s effective in making him look as hard as any other suburban teenager posing with a glock in a selfie. It still amazes me though, being that he’s a Patriot and all… that he has learned nothing about the importance of destroying evidence BEFORE you’re caught from his team.

    Anyway, here’s a link to that selfie, which by the way, I believe TMZ actually found/broke before anyone else. #teammoron http://tmz.me/12JR1HD

    • No; the fact he shot his friend is the crime.
      This is just footage of him possessing the weapon hours before the alleged murder..

      I see you’ve completely missed the concept of evidence.
      Don’t ever join the Police dpt

  5. you know what i love, the fact that people will still argue of something so stupid, like this murder case which is comedic. kyle wilson, make me a sandwich, just for acting like a woman

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