Tony Romo Practicing For First Time Since Surgery To Remove Ovarian Cyst

2014-offseason-workouts-begin-tony-romo-celebrates-birthday-with-a-return-to-the-practice-fiel

FORTH WORTH, TEXAS, CA—According to sources inside the Dallas Cowboys training staff, quarterback Tony Romo returned to the practice field Thursday for the first time since undergoing surgery to remove a painful ovarian cyst. “Tony appears to have responded well to the procedure, and given the rate at which his ovarian cyst was growing, I’m glad we got in there when we did,” said Dr. Peter Baskin, who removed the four inch fluid-filled sac after the signal-caller reported constant abdominal discomfort during voluntary OTA’s. “If we had waited any longer, it very well could have spread to his uterus. Hopefully Tony can still have children.” Baskin told reporters that there will most likely be some scarring along the fallopian tubes, but Romo’s range of motion should remained unaffected.

(The Onion)

60 COMMENTS

    • Since you must have missed the article: “FORTH WORTH, TEXAS, CA—According to sources inside the Dallas Cowboys training staff, quarterback Tony Romo returned to the practice field Thursday for the first time since undergoing surgery to remove a painful ovarian cyst. “Tony appears to have responded well to the procedure, and given the rate at which his ovarian cyst was growing, I’m glad we got in there when we did,” said Dr. Peter Baskin, who removed the four inch fluid-filled sac after the signal-caller reported constant abdominal discomfort during voluntary OTA’s. “If we had waited any longer, it very well could have spread to his uterus. Hopefully Tony can still have children.” Baskin told reporters that there will most likely be some scarring along the fallopian tubes, but Romo’s range of motion should remained unaffected.”.

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  2. I am extremely angry and hurt that whoever wrote this story would think it appropriate to use women’s health issues as material for a joke. Ruptured cysts, infertility, and problems with the uterus are all main symptoms and results of a very painful disease called endometriosis. Endometriosis affects 1 in 10 women in the US and 176 women worldwide. It is one of the most painful, debilitating, misunderstoood, misdiagnosed diseases and it has devestated the lives of so many women and their families.Those of us who fight this disease everyday of our lives are done everything we can to raise awareness and to educate the public and the medical community. Despite our best efforts, we still see ignorance and a lack of compassion and support from most people. It’s not ok to make fun of all the women who live everyday with exhaustion and extreme pain. Women can die from ruptured cysts and infertility is never something to be included in a joke. Until you walk a day in our shoes and until you can understand what we go through I suggest you keep women’s health issues out of your repertoire for jokes. You need to apologize to every women out there who lives with these health threats and symptoms !

    • Wow, why are you even on this site. The fact that you followed through with the urge to write a rant about about this “article,” is impressive. Seriously though… use your outrage in more useful places.

      • I don’t ever go on this site but one of my “friends” on fb thought it would be appropriate and funny to post this article after seeing my very open struggle with endometriosis. Of course they posted this article after I had spent a month trying to raise awareness and educate my friends on what it’s like living with this disease. I only went on this site because I refuse to be a silent like the masses of ignorant spineless people on the Internet who feel the need to use someone’s health problems or misfortune as a means for a punchline for some pathetic attempt at a joke. People need to stop being so insensitive and cruel to each other. Perhaps the next time someone uses a disease to make fun of someone they will stop and realize that there are REAL people whose lives have been devestated and who live in pain every day because of their health problems. I’m all for telling jokes and satire and I am not one of those nut job liberals who gets offended by everything but it is NEVER justified to make fun of someone at the expense of people who live with an incurable and dangerous disease or health problems.

        • Then why do you feel the need to comment here where no one gives a shit. Go back to your fairy tale perfect life.

      • She must be searching for a new husband. It is not her fault she could not figure it out after the first three. Some people are just born that way.

    • Oh, Sweetie, Get the F over yourself! I have endometriosis, I am completely incapable of having children, I have SEVERE cramps every month. As a matter of fact, between my 2 sisters and I we have 1(adult now)child, because it is very strong in our family….
      That being said…

      I LAUGHED MY ASS OFF AT THIS! I was in NO WAY offended! DailySnark; keep it coming!

      So, Karen Skau, don’t EVER ask for an apology for anyone but your own sorry ass!

      • You’re comments are so immature and ignorant that it would be beneath me to stoop to your level. The fact that you don’t understand how offensive this article is just makes you a disgrace and embarrassment toall of us women with endometriosis fighting everyday for respect, understanding, compassion, and support.

          • Actually a reply does not mean that I stooped to her level. If I started swearing and acting ignorant then that would be stooping to her level. I refuse to be rude and ignorant; I was brought up better than that.

          • So mental retardation counts. You should go see a doctor and see if they can adjust your medication.

          • I understand the genre of satire but making fun of someone by using a crippling disability that has devasted the lives of so many women is not funny. Where along the line did it become acceptable to be so insensitive and mean just because your hiding behind a computer screen?! Humanity needs to learn to be kind and compassionate to each other again on the Internet as well as in real life.

          • By the way, you’vr been flagged and reported for your ugly, disgusting comments directed towards me. How dare you talk to any woman that way! Shame on you.

          • You think I should talk differently to a woman than a man? Naaaa, stupid is stupid. I call it like it is. If you had a set of balls you probably wouldn’t be here crying like a little biotch.

          • Another self-righteousness ass hole who did not understand the passage where they were told to shut the fuck up because your God would deal with it when they were standing at the pearly gates. People like you give humanity a bad name.

          • “Your’re Dumb” is the proper way to say this.

            Kind of ironic don’t you think?

          • Also, “Can it Karen”. You did not win that argument just because his grammar was not proper. You are still an idiot.

          • I am offended there is the need for jake to be offended that your offended by the nonoffensiveness of this article.

        • My “comments are so immature and ignorant ” ?!?! Excuse me? How is explaining my situation ignorant, exactly? I do not believe that what I said could be deemed immature. I DO believe that you are completely ignorant. You DO NOT speak for all women! You DO NOT speak for all women who have this conndition! Do not try to convince anyone that you do! I do have Endometriosis, and I do suffer with the pain, both physical and emotional. However I do not (generally) feel the need to spout off to anyone who will listen, about my uterus. It is nobody’s business what’s going on inside my body.
          I am completely at a loss over your statement; “all of us women with endometriosis fighting everyday for respect, understanding, compassion, and support.” WHAT?!?! Go see a doctor, get some freaking pain pills, or get a hysterectomy and GET OVER YOURSELF!
          While you’re at the Dr. see if he can remove that stick in your ass, and possibly surgically insert a sense of humor!

          • “What nice knockers”.

            By the way your username is awesome.

            It’s a “Young Frankenstein” reference to those who thought I was trying to be rude.

      • Classy. It’s so pathetic how horrible some people can be to each other when they’re hiding behind their keyboards. We’re all on this planet together so we might as well be kind to each other while we’re here. Life too short to go around hurting each other with our words.

        • Nobody cares lady. Your not important. Nobody wants your unsolicited opinion in any fashion. You are not important and the concept that someone should appologize because you read something that hurt your little feelings is ridiculous. Grow a thicker skin. Adopt a child. Go get a puppy, but for the love of all fucks that are holy, take your victimized ass else where. I’m glad you can’t have children and teach them to be as stupid and sensitive as you are! Think of it as a sign from God… He messed up on you and made sure he wasn’t gonna mess up on anymore in your line! Haha

          • Evil words from a coward hiding behind a keyboard. What a sad, pathetic life you must live. I truly feel sorry for you. Karma is going to catch up with you someday and it’s not going to be kind.

          • You seriously brought “God” into that statement brent? You need to go back to your Bible buddy cuz what you wrote above DID NOT come from God. You come on here and make “real” Christians look bad. Shame on you. Go to your prayer closet now.

          • Wow you are an idiot. You must be a Christian or a Politician, because your ability to comprehend the words that were actually written and not your own personal interpretation is about as par as a child with downs syndrome, with the exception that they are much smarter then you are. If you call yourself a Christian then you already look bad. God is as real as Pikachu. Accepted by those who don’t know any better.

    • I wonder how some people get through the day being so incensed over everything written on social media that they don’t agree with or hurts their feelings. Must be tough.

    • Unless your name is “Karen Skau”. This bitch is as dumb as they come, or in her case it would be the cum running down her throat.

  3. Ooops,…backing out the door with the sign “hilarious” and as I entered deeper into the room the conversation escalated quickly into a savage beat down…………………..”you dumb cunt”….i came into the room at the wrong time.

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