Harambe Kneels During National Anthem In Protest Of His Unjust Death

By
Randy Oliver
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FOXBORUGH, MA – Colin Kaepernick first sitting for the National Anthem five weeks ago in the preseason has ignited a movement. Sitting/kneeling during the National Anthem to protest injustice, police brutality and oppression in this country has found its way to different sports and different ages. It’s now found it’s way to another species.

Ahead of the Miami Dolphins taking on the New England Patriots in Foxborugh, what appeared to be the ghost of Haramabe was spotted kneeling on the sideline along with four other Phins players.

Early reports are that the silverback gorilla was protesting his unjust death. Harambe was tragically shot dead after a child allegedly fell into his Cincinnati Zoo enclosure. The 440lb. beast was born and raised at Zoo Miami, explaining his ties to the Dolphins.

“I mean it’s just ridiculous. Can a small child run onto the field during a Cowboys game and go over to Tony Romo so they could shoot him? But then again that won’t happen. Double standard,” Harambe told reporters. “It also won’t happen cause he’s never on the field.”

Contrary to the reaction of NFL players protesting the anthem, it appears as if almost everyone is siding with Harambe is overwhelming fashion. The public itself has been protesting his death with never-ending memes, so much so that the Cincinnati Zoo had to deactivate their social media accounts after being bombarded with them. There is even a petition to change the line “oh say can you see” to “dicks out for Harambe.”

There is no word yet if Harambe will lose his endorsement from Gorilla Glue.

 

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