In a shocking revelation, or should we say Revelations, President Donald J Trump killed his personal assistant Carolyn Gombell sometime in October 2000, the highest ranking source in the known Universe revealed today. In a series of tweets, God has gone on to say that Trump strangled her with his own tiny baby raccoon hands after he got her preggers. He then bribed then NYPD Police Chief Bernie Kierk to keep it quiet. God has urged the public that it is time to investigate.
Donald Trump killed his personal assistant, Carolyn Gombell, in October 2000. He strangled her because he'd gotten her pregnant and was threatening to tell the press. Then he bribed NYPD Police Chief Bernie Kierik to cover it up. IT'S TIME TO INVESTIGATE. #JusticeForCarolyn
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) May 26, 2020
The Most High then went on a twitter posting spree giving out many details about the torrid affair, even stating that Carolyn’s roommate was perhaps murdered instead of committing suicide by jumping in front of a large train.
Many others on Twitter have joined in on the fight to bring awareness, which is accordingly going to God’s plan. Who knew?
It's irresponsible to share the #JusticeForCarolyn hashtag without first looking in to this.
— Cyber Force One (@realcyberforce1) May 26, 2020
Thankfully, that has been done. #JusticeForCarolyn
So let's talk about Carolyn Gombell for a few. #JusticeForCarolyn would be a very inconvenient hashtag to trend. Wouldn't #JusticeForCarolyn? I mean, maybe not her family. They might be excited at the prospect of #JusticeForCarolyn. Who else wants to see #JusticeForCarolyn?
— CalliopeJane (@PixieCalliope) May 26, 2020
Time for #JusticeForCarolyn to trend.
— Eric (@EricJamesS21) May 26, 2020
Which, in fact, it did. Its that God is on our side. This time.